Berkeley and a B+

Maybe it's because I've been really sick all week (thus, no blogs) Ok, I really do think that I see everything as half-full.....I had great, fabulous news this week - I got into Berkeley's Sociology PhD program - yahoo! But why isn't it so great - cuz I ruined my 3.92 GPA from last semester and got a B+ in this silly Persuasion class, which makes me want to quit school. Can I really endure that many more years of perfectionist tendancies and heartbreak in a high-pressure academic environment?

Berkeley's program is one the top Sociology Departments in the country (most recent stat I saw was #2). Funny?, meanwhile, that I didn't get into BC - which is not as "good" and also not in the Bay Area, which is where we plan to be anyway. But I'm not really as upset about this wholehearted rejection as I am about a damned good grade at Harvard of all places. Yikes.

My mind has been spinning this week trying to think about this decision. They have a week-end designed for accepted students in a month. For me the question is less should I go to Berkeley but more should I deal with more grad school. The thing is that I have wanted to do this for soooo long and have resisted it on so many levels - from comrades who found it unworthy of an activist - to other academics who lament the time and pressure involved. I am actually feeling not that worried overall about being in school that long but more about quality of life with my kids and Chris and my overall health. It's so stressful with Chris at home with the kids. What would it be like with Chris at work full-time. We are also already in massive debt, and it's scary to think about not being as present with my kids.

For my comparative media studies class at MIT, I'm reading a master's thesis from last year and analyzing it - it's about the "unschooling" movement - it makes me realize that this is the type of education where Liam would really and utterly thrive - but I just can't imagine doing it - maybe with support - and it's that type of community that I want to re-establish when we go back - maybe even figuring out some type of group house situation that would make all of this more possible????