hiding motherhood

I've been struggling with how to "present" myself in my new role at Cal. However much I hated it when that K school administrator told me not to be "out" about being a mother - she was partially correct. Statistics show how mothers are discriminated against in hiring. The funny thing is that fathers are hired the most, then parentless men and then parentless women - and finally women. So I have been cautious about bringing Liam to my first visit to the dept. - or not to mention anything about my kids when "introducing" myself on-line - I am not in any way ashamed of being a parent - but I don't want that to be the first thing people remember me by - it's trite, but the saying, "You never get a second chance to make a first impression" has certainly impressed me since my high school English teacher repeated it ad nauseum. I think I just want to be known for me - and in this context, my intellectual self - but who is self, anyway? I took a whole class at Harvard last year exploring identity and leadership - of course, being a mother is part of who I am, but if we really did live in a colorblind society (not sure of the analogy for parents - motherblind society - that doesn't sound quite right either) then I wouldn't have a problem with being "out" from the beginning. Wow. It's embarrassing to write this stuff down, but, alas, this is the way it is...